Such a God?
🙏 Suffering, chaos, and the God who shows up anyway.
The Question We All Ask
I was recently asked (OK, I’ve been asked many times through my ministry), “How can I believe in a God that allows suffering to take place?”
The question usually comes from someone who is suffering, or a witness to suffering (a family member or friend), or anyone who pays attention to the news.
It’s usually less about theology and more about survival: How can I believe in such a God?
It’s a tricky question because it assumes a few things about God. It’s also tricky because every person has a unique experience of God and suffering. I can only answer for myself.
And if you are asking this question yourself — because you are hurting, or watching someone you love suffer, or simply overwhelmed by the news — please know: you’re not wrong to ask. You’re not weak for wondering. And you are not alone.
The World We’ve Been Given
I don’t expect God to intervene in suffering. That’s not exactly true. I don’t expect God to prevent suffering. That’s not the world we’ve been given.
From a spiritual perspective, it was chaos to begin with, and God reined it in so that we could exist. Creation is a gift — sometimes beautiful, sometimes sharp-edged.
Our choices are part of that chaos. We aren’t programmed to behave in particular ways, so the choices we make — and the choices of corporations, governments, and neighbors — deeply affect one another.
Pollution taints our water and air. Smoking harms our lungs and the lungs of those around us. Shifting tectonic plates cause earthquakes and waves.
Greed and jealousy bring injustice. We have plenty of resources but a problem sharing them. And when suffering comes close, we start asking about God, trying to make simple sense out of complicated pain.
The Witness of Scripture
It has been this way since the beginning of time. The ancient stories often relegate seasons of turmoil to someone bigger, stronger, wiser.
The Bible is full of accidents, mishaps, illness, and vicious animals. Sometimes those perils are attributed to God, but not always. Even the ancients understood: sometimes, terrible things just happen.
It’s the same way today. Sometimes awful stuff befalls us and the people we care about.
At those moments, my question is not, “How can I believe in a God such as this?” but rather:
“How could I survive without a God such as this?”
Where God Shows Up
Time after time in the Bible and in daily life, I have experienced a deity who is there when the hammer falls.
I have been comforted by the presence of a Spirit who holds me while I shake my fist and sob about the horrors I am facing. I have heard the quiet assurance of Someone beyond my grasp whispering, “You are not alone.”
Those moments strengthen me. I am not a particularly courageous individual. I suffer from PTSD and shrink away from loud noises and horrific sights. The smell of smoke used to send me down a dark path.
Thanks to many years of therapy and a rich prayer life, I find myself summoning something that is beyond me, something that works through me, to attend to the kind of suffering that is close to my own.
I feel the work of the Holy moving through me to draw near and say from experience, “It won’t always be like this for you. God is working to heal you in this moment.”
Stories That Sustain
Those moments help me to help others. Drawing from my experience (and the experiences of others who have found strength from God in the midst of crisis), I can share stories of joy returning after tragedy, or of peace discovered even in dying.
One woman told me many years ago that even in her final days, she knew God was there — snuffing out the disease and lifting her to new life.
Like the stories in the Bible, when God surprises people with an unexpected answer (see the Red Sea, the feeding of the 5000, the Resurrection), I look with folks for unanticipated blessings. They may not resolve everything, but they help us endure with God’s help.
An Eternal Ally
Those stories fill me with a peace that takes the edge off just long enough so that I can move beyond my own pain and tend to the hurt of others.
This theology — of seeing God as an eternal ally instead of an adversary — makes room for grace to bring healing to a situation.
I was with a family as they disconnected their child from life support. The child was aware of what was about to happen, and the room was electric with panic, sadness, fear, and grief.
The mom turned to me at one point and asked, “Will he be with God?”
I could answer with confidence:
“He already is. He’ll just be closer. No more suffering to distract him. No more disease to keep him from expressing his love.”
We prayed together, held one another, and felt God’s love enter that space in a profound way as the child transitioned into their next life.
Moments like that remind me: no matter the situation — however awful — there is always an opportunity to see both in it and beyond it. God is with us: sometimes correcting, sometimes cajoling, sometimes informing, sometimes healing, sometimes celebrating.
Always engaging with us so that we can move closer to that sweet spot of being whole in God’s holy love.
The Last Word
The question “How can I believe in a God such as this?” searches desperately for a compassionate and just deity.
I have known this God to be here, even in the worst moments of our lives.
For me, the better question is not, “How can I believe in such a God?” but rather:
“How could I survive without such a God?”
The theology I embrace knows God as an eternal ally who is here for us… even when we least expect it.


Thank you to Reverend Farnsworth for this precious reminder
You are very welcome.